how to confuse trick or treaters- funnnny?

IF YOU TRY THESE LEME NO

~~1~~ Give away something other than candy (Toothpicks, golf balls, bags of sand, etc.).

~~2~~ Wait behind the door until some people come. When they get near the door, jump out, wearing a costume, and holding a bag, and yell, "Trick or Treat!" Look at them, scratch your head, and act confused.

~~3~~ Fill a briefcase with marbles and crackers. Write on it, "Top Secret" in big letters. When trick-or-treaters come, look around suspiciously, say, "It's about time you got here," give them the briefcase, and quickly shut the door.

~~4~~ Get about 30 people to wait in your living room. When trick-or-treaters come to the door, say, "Come in." When they do, have everyone yell, "Surprise!!!" Act like it's a surprise party.

~~5~~ Get everyone who comes to the door to come in and see if they can figure out what's wrong with your dishwasher. Insist that it makes an unnatural "whirring" sound.

~~6~~ After you give them candy, hand the trick-or-treaters a bill.

~~7~~ Open the door dressed as a giant fish. Immediately collapse, and don't move or say anything until the trick-or-treaters go away.

~~8~~ When you answer the door, hold up one candybar, throw it out into the street, and yell, "Crawl for it!"

~~9~~ When you answer the door, look at the trick-or-treaters, act shocked and scared, and start screaming your head off. Slam the door and runaround the house, screaming until they go away.

~~10~~ Insist that the trick-or-treaters each do ten push-ups before you give them any candy.

~~11~~ Hand out menus to the trick-or-treaters and let them order their candy. Keep asking if anyone wants to see the wine list.

~~12~~ Get a catapult. Sit on your porch and catapult pumpkins at anyone who comes within 50 yards of your house.

~~13~~ When people come to the door, jump out a nearby window, crashing through the glass, and run as far away from your house as you can.

~~14~~ Answer the door dressed as a pilgrim. Stare at the trick-or-treaters for a moment, pretend to be confused, and start flipping through a calendar.

~~15~~ Instead of candy, give away colored eggs. If anyone protests, explain that the eggs are the only thing you had left over from Easter.

~~16~~ Answer the door dressed as a dentist. Angrily give the trick-or-treaters a two-hour lecture on tooth decay.

~~17~~ Answer the door with a mouthful of M & M's and several half-eaten candy bars in your hands. Act surprised, and close the door. Open it again in a few seconds, and insist that you don't have any candy.

~~18~~ Hand out cigarettes and bottles of asprin.

~~19~~ Put a crown on a pumpkin and put the pumpkin on a throne on your porch. Insist that all of the trick-or-treaters bow before The Great Pumpkin.

~~20~~ Dress up like a bunny rabbit. Yell and curse from the moment you open the door, and angrily throw the candy at the trick-or-treaters. Slam the door when you're finished.

How not to be single?

So I've been single for a year now, and dated a few people. I would not say that I'm too picky since the reasons for not dating these people after a first or second date include a guys saying "I love you" on a first date, and one telling me he was the superhero Superman and wore the costume sometimes..yeah...ok..

I'm a model and take computer science classes. I'm not an idiot, and I am not ugly. I love the outdoors, camping, hiking, fishing, movies, photography. Why can't I find a person to share these things with?

It seems like everyone has a bf or gf and is oh so happy these days, I just want someone to have fun with and develope something with.

Any ideas where to meet decent people?

How do I make a few dates into something more?

43 Ways To Get kicked Out Of Wallie-World!!!?

1. Take someone's shopping cart and switch the items with stuff from the person next to them's cart
2. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!..." etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment
3. Smash the person in front of you on the head with a ham
4. Go up to some old geezer & say "Grandpa!!! You're ALIVE!!! It's a MIRACLE!!! etc."
5. Take something from someone else's cart, when they say "hey, that's mine! " call the security and say that the other ... person was trying to take your _____
6. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.
7. Hide in the center of the clothes circle where people find shirts, and jump out and yell "AIHAIHAIHAIHAIHAIHAIHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!"
8. Go into the dressing room, wait a few minutes, then yell "THERES NO TOILET PAPER IN HERE!!"
9. Get a batman costume, put it on, and run around the store screaming at the top of your lungs, "COME ROBIN! TO THE BATMOBILE!"
10. Hide between clothing and then jump out and yell "PICK ME"
11. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"
12. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men
13. Hide in a clothes circle. When someone with a shopping cart goes by stick your hand out and steal something from them
14. Grab a guitar and start singing Wake Me Up When September Ends in a loud shrieking half screaming voice
15. Randomly place 24 bags of candy in peoples carts
16. Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out.
17. Go up to an employee and in a official tone say "code three in house ware" and see what happens
18. Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department
19. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap
20. Set up a concert of singing hamster dolls. Get your friends and turn them on all at the same time. Then act like a conductor
21. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., "Do you have any Shnerples here?"
22. Open a pack of yugioh cards and challenge random people to a "d-d-d-d-d-d-duel!"
23. While walking around alone, pretend someone is with you and get into a very serious conversation
24. Tape a walkie-talkie to the back of a Barbie doll and say to random people, "I know where you live..."
25. Attempt to drown in a kiddy pool...
26. Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it
27. Open up random packages in the toy aisle then walk off. If an employee asks what you're doing, just say "I changed my mind."
28. Run around Wal-Mart in a bathing suit singing the Surfin' USA theme song
29. Say things like, "Would you be as kind so to direct me to your Twinkies?"
30. If an employee comes within 30 ft scream "GET AWAY FROM ME!!!" Then run out of the store screaming
31. Walk up to an employee and ask questions like how come this store is called wal mart? Or what's up with your hair? Why do you people wear name tags can't you all remember your own names?
32. Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles
33. Glare menacingly at anyone who comes within 40 ft of you. Then hiss like a snake and act like you're going to bite them
34. Throw a fake rubber snake into some lady's face and watch her freak out
35. Squeeze their legs and either sing, "I like to move it, move it! Or say "You got chicken legs!"
36. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission: Impossible."
37. While no one's watching quickly switch the men's and women's signs on the doors of the rest room
38. Bring your pet pit-bull into Wal-mart. Act casual. If someone is brave enough to walk up to you and tell you to get out, simply reply "He's going to help me pick out his favorite dog food"
39. TP as much of the store as possible
40. Whenever you hear a voice saying, clean up etc fall to the ground sobbing screaming the voices!! then get back up & act normal
41. Dress up in a trench coat & wear sunglasses. Walk up to someone browsing and say "The rooster is in the nest" Wait for a reply. After they finish talking, hand them a cap gun and whisper "use this wisely."
42. Go to the music aisle and start singing horrible karaoke
43. Walk along look at someone giggle at them & say to no one... I know I know... hehehe keep doing it until they give you a weird look & walk off
Please let me know if you have any more and pl

please help...need to see if this sounds ok?

Food and colour imagery enhances the readers understanding of the text and in the Jockey; Bitsy Barlow has many incidents where it illustrates his inner conflict. The use of food and colour imagery allows the reader to have a better understanding of what the author is trying to convey through their piece of writing. Bitsy Barlow has a inner conflict which he is having trouble facing, because his conflict is not something that you can change overnight!
Bitsy Barlow was wearing “a suit of green Chinese silk that evening, tailored precisely and the size of a costume outfit for a child. The shirt was yellow, the tie striped with pastel colours.” Jockeys are always small and they always wear fun coloured and bright t-shirts while riding their horses in races, but to go out it that outfit is a bit childish. It seems like he doesn’t care about his integrity or if people think he is childish because of what he is wearing!
“His face was drawn, ageless, and gray. They were shadowed hollows at his temples and his mouth was set in a wiry smile.” From what they describe Bitsy seems to be overworked and very tired. Bitsy is not aging but he is very overworked and tired. “He drew a gold cigarette case from his pocket and snapped it open. Inside were a few cigarettes and a tiny gold penknife.” “On his wrist was a gold link bracelet that clinched against the table edge.” Gold is a symbol of power, wealth and importance. Bitsy is trying to show the other three mean that he is as high in class as them and that he has power and wealth too. Even though he has the gold cigarette case, he is not any better than the other three men, actually him trying to be better than them makes his insecure.
From the sound of the food at the restaurant it seems to be an upscale one; “before the rich man was a fish casserole……, Sylvester had ordered eggs Benedict and Simmons had a beefsteak.” For an average person that would not be a typical meal and from the sound of the food it seems to be a higher class restaurant.
“His hand reached out toward the plate nearest to him and deliberately he put a few of the French-fried potatoes in his mouth…He chewed slowly, his upper lip raised, then he turned and spat out the pulpy mouthful on the smooth red carpet which covered the floor.” This just shows how much disrespect he has towards the three men; the trainer, the bookie and the rich man.
In the end, Bitsy has no choice but to believe that he is can never be like the three men, he can’t change himself or his ways. Food and colour imagery enhances the readers understanding of the text and allows them to understand the text in their own way!

Thanks in advance

Ways to get kicked out of Wal-Mart.?

Which is ur fav and which one would u try?

1. Take someone's shopping cart and switch the items with stuff from the person next to them's cart
2. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!..." etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment
3. Smash the person in front of you on the head with a ham
4. Go up to some old geezer & say "Grandpa!!! You're ALIVE!!! It's a MIRACLE!!! etc."
5. Take something from someone else's cart, when they say "hey, that's mine! " call the security and say that the other ... person was trying to take your _____
6. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.
7. Hide in the center of the clothes circle where people find shirts, and jump out and yell "AIHAIHAIHAIHAIHAIHAIHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!"
8. Go into the dressing room, wait a few minutes, then yell "THERES NO TOILET PAPER IN HERE!!"
9. Get a batman costume, put it on, and run around the store screaming at the top of your lungs, "COME ROBIN! TO THE BATMOBILE!"
10. Hide between clothing and then jump out and yell "PICK ME"
11. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"
12. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men
13. Hide in a clothes circle. When someone with a shopping cart goes by stick your hand out and steal something from them
14. Grab a guitar and start singing Wake Me Up When September Ends in a loud shrieking half screaming voice
15. Randomly place 24 bags of candy in peoples carts
16. Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out.
17. Go up to an employee and in a official tone say "code three in house ware" and see what happens
18. Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department
19. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap
20. Set up a concert of singing hamster dolls. Get your friends and turn them on all at the same time. Then act like a conductor
21. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., "Do you have any Shnerples here?"
22. Open a pack of yugioh cards and challenge random people to a "d-d-d-d-d-d-duel!"
23. While walking around alone, pretend someone is with you and get into a very serious conversation
24. Tape a walkie-talkie to the back of a Barbie doll and say to random people, "I know where you live..."
25. Attempt to drown in a kiddy pool...
26. Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it
27. Open up random packages in the toy aisle then walk off. If an employee asks what you're doing, just say "I changed my mind."
28. Run around Wal-Mart in a bathing suit singing the Surfin' USA theme song
29. Say things like, "Would you be as kind so to direct me to your Twinkies?"
30. If an employee comes within 30 ft scream "GET AWAY FROM ME!!!" Then run out of the store screaming
31. Walk up to an employee and ask questions like how come this store is called wal mart? Or what's up with your hair? Why do you people wear name tags can't you all remember your own names?
32. Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles
33. Glare menacingly at anyone who comes within 40 ft of you. Then hiss like a snake and act like you're going to bite them
34. Throw a fake rubber snake into some lady's face and watch her freak out
35. Squeeze their legs and either sing, "I like to move it, move it! Or say "You got chicken legs!"
36. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission: Impossible."
37. While no one's watching quickly switch the men's and women's signs on the doors of the rest room
38. Bring your pet pit-bull into Wal-mart. Act casual. If someone is brave enough to walk up to you and tell you to get out, simply reply "He's going to help me pick out his favorite dog food"
39. TP as much of the store as possible
40. Whenever you hear a voice saying, clean up etc fall to the ground sobbing screaming the voices!! then get back up & act normal
41. Dress up in a trench coat & wear sunglasses. Walk up to someone browsing and say "The rooster is in the nest" Wait for a reply. After they finish talking, hand them a cap gun and whisper "use this wisely."
42. Go to the music aisle and start singing horrible karaoke
43. Walk along look at someone giggle at them & say to no one... I know I know... hehehe keep doing it until they give you a weird look & walk off
44. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day
45. Go in to the camping department and enter a tent then tell random customers that they can come in if they bring a pillow from the bedding department
46. Broadcast K-mart commercials over the intercom
47. Go up to the bagel section with cream cheese all o
who cares if it is immature...enjoy life a little

P.S. ppl that say stuff that is immature are trying to hide their own faults

also the ones who say it is immature are probally going to do part of this ist next time the go to wal-mart
opps i made some spelling mistakes

also the ones who say it is immature are probally going to do part of this the next time they go to wal-mart